Monday, February 28, 2011

Hospital Day 4 | Frustration and weight loss

Nathan lost a kilo since Friday afternoon.  That's 2.2 pounds in 3 days.  I'd be excited about losing that much weight in that time frame if I were referring to my husband or myself but I am talking about 31 pound Nathan.  Which means we just reversed 6 months of weight gain in less than 3 days.

He will not even drink Pediasure.  I am concerned and frustrated.  Aside from the rapid weight loss and lack of appetite, I was less than pleased with Nathan's nurse today.  A half hour IV infusion is long enough for an energetic boy, he should not have to have his line connected for one second beyond completion let alone close to 45 minutes while the nurse did not respond to the call button.  You could also imagine my reaction to finding a couple of {needle-less} syringes in Nathan's bed with him, one containing his blood, along with a bloody alcohol wipe.

Then you add in heightened emotions, exhaustion, and an unimaginable level of stress.  Basically the hour long drive home from the hospital was one that was filled with tears.  And although I originally intended to put Teagan to bed and make myself a drink, I ended up dealing with stinky wet laundry forgotten in the washing machine and moldy smelling 4 day old chili sitting on the kitchen table, and a sink full of dirty dishes.

So now that I've overexhausted my already exhausted self, I'm gathering the heavy artillery for tomorrow, Scandi shakes and 1.5 cal pediasure and boost, and heading to bed.

That's all folks.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Hospital Day 3 | Our new normal

A post of many photos and few words.

We are finally beginning to find our new normal.

Teagan is has taken off.  She is constantly cruising around the hospital room.  She still looks like she would rather be on her feet but is stuck crawling for now.

Nathan hospital admission day 3 - 1

Nathan enjoyed several surprise visits today from his Great Uncle Paulie, Gappa "Luigi", and mama's friend Merissa who came bearing all sorts of goodies...

Nathan hospital admission day 3 - 2

...including a really cool 3D book.

Nathan hospital admission day 3 4

Nathan managed to figure out how to play around the room while having his IV infusions.  I would much rather him stay in bed because I can just imagine him yanking his picc line out somehow.

Nathan hospital admission day 3 8

He got his first of many rides on his IV pole.

Nathan hospital admission day 3 9

Nathan hospital admission day 3 10

And I finally managed to get that gigantic Super Mario shirt off him.  Although I promised to bring it back to him clean first thing in the morning and since I don't like to break a promise I got stuck doing laundry when I got home from the hospital.

Nathan hospital admission day 3 12

And now, with the  Academy Awards on as background noise, I am going to spend a few moments working on Nathan's orange and blue photo project.  Thank you to everyone who has taking the time to send me photos of your children and pets wearing orange and blue in support for Nathan.  And if you would still like to show your support for Nathan, there will be plenty of room for me to add more to this "project".

Nathan hospital admission day 3 13

Nathan hospital admission day 3 14

All your prayers and good thoughts must be paying off, life in the hospital isn't easy but I now feel like we will all survive the two week admission.  Nathan amazes me more and more each day.  He has been in isolation in his hospital room for 3 days now and is dealing with it better than I could myself.  Love him!

Nathan hospital admission day 3 15

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Hospital Day 2

This is Nathan's 2nd day in the hospital although it is technically only one full day out of the 14. I think we all are beginning to feel how very long these two weeks are going to be.

Nathan is doing much better today.  Most of the day he is the boy with the big smile that we are all used to.  He was not fond of the dressing change {covering his picc line} at all.  His coughing fits made him vomit twice and he really has not eaten much aside from 2 cans of Nutren Jr.  I think he did eat one chocolate chip out of the chocolate chip cookie.

I on the other hand need to keep my fingers off of Nathan's meal trays.  I carefully select the most delicious and fattening items from the menu that I think Nathan might enjoy and instead just stuff my face so the food does not get wasted.

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 1

He is actually being cooperative, telling the nurse where he would like her to take his blood pressure and which finger he would like to be his "E.T. finger" {pulse oximeter}.

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 7

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 8

This evening when he saw the nurse come in to take his vitals, he threw off his covers and put his leg into the air and told her to put it {blood pressure cuff} on his leg.

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 9

He fell asleep during the 2nd and 4th chest treatment of the day {nebs and chest pounding}.

He has many familiar faces in the form of toys...

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 3

...and little sisters to keep him company during the day.

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 4

But even though he seems to be adjusting, his innocent little eyes are still tearing me apart on a constant basis.  I can't stand that he is adjusting to all this abnormality.  This is not normal for children to deal with.  Every time he asks either my husband or myself "I wanna go home, take me home, bring my blankies home, carry pillow pet home" I feel like snatching him away and bringing him to his favorite seat on the end of the sofa near his vest and making him all cozy with his blankies just the way he likes them.

Nathan hospital admission 2011 - 2

I love you Nathan, although 40 miles may separate us every night while you are in the hospital, know that I am thinking about you and your sweet little face non-stop.




Finally a really good session of manual CPT!

Friday, February 25, 2011

Hospital Day 1

Teagan and I just got home to get some sleep.  I figured I would post a quick update while I wait for the cats to finish eating.

Today was absolutely heartbreaking for me.  You probably wouldn't notice by looking at me but I am an absolute wreck holding it together for Nathan.  Watching my son fight sedation with tears in his eyes, begging us to save him...horrible.  Hearing him tell us that he is going home to see his friend, Ayden...so sad.  Walking into recovery to him already awake and frantically attempting to rip the IV out of his hand...sucks.

I love this little boy and would do anything for him.

I hate that I had to leave him tonight but the hospital won't allow Teagan to stay overnight.  The stress of these two weeks is enough to make my milk supply wither away to nothing.

I think Nathan is adjusting to the picc line* inserted just above his elbow although he is still saying my "boo boo hurt".

*A picc line is a "peripherally inserted central catheter", otherwise a small tube that is inserted into a vein in the upper arm until it reaches a large vein in the chest near the heart.

Mama, daddy and Nathan all hopped a ride on the stretcher to get his chest xray.  Man those things pick up speed down the sloped hallways.  The chest xray itself did not go well even with the help of Grover's good example.  I could tell Nathan felt like he was in the same room, with the same sort of instruments as earlier in the day.  The same crying, the same look in his watery eyes, the same desperation to escape the situation.

He is currently on two intravenous antibiotics on top of his typical medications.  Nebulizer treatments every four hours with manual chest pt.

He is such a amicable, easy going little guy. Thank you for the continued support, love, and prayers.  Again I feel so blessed to have such wonderful people in our lives.  And I really love the photographs of your kiddos {and dogs} wearing orange and blue.  I can't wait to compile them into a video for our little Nathan.  Little Nathan, Big Heart!

Ok, gotta go give Teagan her own antibiotic {ear infection}, get some sleep, and get back to my little fighter.


Admission day

This is going to be short and sweet since we are leaving for the hospital in a half hour, as soon as I finish treatments.

I managed to sleep last night without any alcohol. I could have used a glass of wine or a margarita but I want to be myself, for Nathan, today.

He has already been cut off from eating and drinking and has just started asking for his morning bottle of pediasure. I managed to delay it without upsetting him but I know he will ask again and it is going to break my heart to disappoint him.

He still has a fever so I know we made the right decision.

He will be sedated and put under for his picc line at 12.

orange and blue for Nathan
Nathan is so blessed to have such amazing friends! {Ayden & Landyn}


Thank you for the continued support and prayers.

Christina

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The First Hospital Admission

The decision has been made, it wasn't an easy one at that but we believe it is the right decision for Nathan at this point in time.

Nathan will be getting his picc line placed this Friday and will be admitted for a 2 week stay to let the IV antibiotics run their course.  I am nervous but know my husband and our families will be very supportive.  I'll be packing tomorrow and tying up some loose ends.

Please pray.

Nathan eat Jan 2011 edit

A difficult decision awaits

Nathan is still culturing staph and pseudomonas.  I have no idea how heavy the growth is but I will be asking his doctor today.

The options are to continue the same course of treatment as last time or to admit him to the hospital for a two week clean out with IV antibiotics.

I'm assuming the "same course of treatment" would be two months of inhaled tobi along with an oral antibiotic.

The decision is really making me sick to my stomach.  The pseudomonas will never completely be gone anyway and I don't even know how these two bacteria have been impacting his lung function because he hasn't had a pulmonary function test since he was 5 months oldI would link to that post but I just realized that I am missing some content post-migration. I'll have to look into that later.  Actually here is his infant pft on my blogger blog.  I am going to request another pft to be performed now, they should have had enough time to learn the machine after two years.

So now the decision still awaits.  There is no way in hell I would leave Nathan for one second in a hospital room by himself.  And there is also no way I can leave Teagan who is still attached to me at the hip, err more like attached at the boobI wonder, has anyone else has been in this position? I can see if they would allow me to come home with him after a few days and after they place the PICC line but I doubt they would agree to that.   Again, I'm not leaving his side, they would have to shoot me with a stun gun.

Monday, February 21, 2011

stuck in a rut, time to change

A few days ago I began to realize that my entire daily existence was a bit like a broken record. Routine is good but not when the routine becomes lazier and more boring each day. Perhaps it has something to do with the time of the year, all the snow keeping us cooped up inside of the house away from the sun that certainly hasn't been shining.

At the time of my realization, I had been waking up and parking my butt of the sofa until I finished 2-3 large cups of coffee. I was rendered practically useless until this coffee consumption ritual was complete.

Then came 30 minutes to an hour of Nathan's treatments. He probably drank 2-3 bottles of Pediasure by this point. Teagan has gone through her rotation of tummy time exploration of our carpet fuzz and empty nebulizer medication ampules, jumper, swing, rocking chair, and 1-2 feedings of anything but solid food.

Next up - lunch. Definitely nothing on the menu for Nathan who is overly energized by this point and ready for a long afternoon nap. God forbid he ever get his little hands on one of our Sparks {giveaway ends this Thursday - Feb 24}. He will get rougher, more energetic, loud, and dangerous and my patience with him will increasingly get thinner. He will either pass out on the sofa with the lack of stimulation or he will run himself ragged until dinner time. Teagan will be playing with her toys, crying, nursing, or being worn by me.

Dinner will be eaten by my husband and myself usually without thought or enjoyment and then we will begin Nathan's nighttime routine which consists of the normal bottle drinking, tooth brushing, diaper and pajama changing. Then we add the prevacid, zyrtec, iron, vest, albuterol, hypertonic saline, and pulmozyme. Thank God he is currently off Tobi, I don't think I could sustain the additional half hour of treatments right now.

Jay carries Nathan and his 5 named microfleece blankets {Nathan named his blankets himself - his "circles", his "mario luigi", his "mickey house", his "blue one", and his "other blanky"} and panda bear pillow pet to bed.

I feed Teagan, she falls asleep, I bring her upstairs and put her into her cradle, she wakes right up, I bring her downstairs, she nurses again, I bring her upstairs after she falls asleep and usually the second time is usually successful.

Then I mindlessly lay on the sofa while Jay plays Wii and some hours later he wakes me up and I go to bed.

This is my day, EVERY day, very FEW things change in this daily routine.

So it is time to change.

First thing I changed was the morning coffee consumption. Neither Jay nor I have consumed a single cup of coffee since last Thursday. We are coffee aholics, truly addicted to the act of drinking our hot coffee our coffee mugs. Thanks to the Spark supplements our energy has never been more even throughout the entire day. No more energy level spiking up and down.

To be honest, we don't even miss the coffee itself. We do still miss the act of drinking it but that is part of my boring daily routine that had me sitting around doing nothing. Inactivity is b-o-r-i-n-g.

I also don't want Nathan sitting around all day being inactive. His lungs need exercise to be healthy and strong. His life depends on healthy lungs. I need to get him moving. At least the weather is getting nicer {or I thought it was...as soon as our deck was clear of snow and I was able to bring our Christmas inflatables inside, we woke up to over 6 inches of fresh snow} and we will be able to resume our daily walks to play at the park. Until then I will just have to put up with the headache of listening to the blower on the bounce house that takes up our entire living room. But you know what, we are very fortunate to have a bounce house. I am very grateful that Jay's brothers and sister and law gave them this gift for Christmas.

I still have to find ways to switch things up but as of now, I am feeling much better. I even jumped back into my old jogging routine. Hey, I only have about a month until the Out Run CF run. And side note it's the event organizer, Emily Schaller's birthday today.

Ok, enough rambling, time to get moving. I'll be drawing the winner for the $40 CSN gift card and will be announcing it this afternoon. Also don't forget to enter the giveaway for Advocare Spark (vitamin and amino acid energy supplement). I would love to help my lovely readers and friends reach some of their financial, energy, weight loss and fitness goals. My husband is only day 4 of the 24 day challenge and has already lost 6 pounds. He normally has an insatiable appetite and surprisingly doesn't even feel like he is starving. 

Sunday, February 20, 2011

stuck in a rut, time to change

A few days ago I began to realize that my entire daily existence was a bit like a broken record. Routine is good but not when the routine becomes lazier and more boring each day. Perhaps it has something to do with the time of the year, all the snow keeping us cooped up inside of the house away from the sun that certainly hasn't been shining.
At the time of my realization, I had been waking up and parking my butt of the sofa until I finished 2-3 large cups of coffee. I was rendered practically useless until this coffee consumption ritual was complete.

Then came 30 minutes to an hour of Nathan's treatments. He probably drank 2-3 bottles of Pediasure by this point. Teagan has gone through her rotation of tummy time exploration of our carpet fuzz and empty nebulizer medication ampules, jumper, swing, rocking chair, and 1-2 feedings of anything but solid food.

Next up - lunch. Definitely nothing on the menu for Nathan who is overly energized by this point and ready for a long afternoon nap. God forbid he ever get his little hands on one of our Sparks {giveaway ends this Thursday - Feb 24}. He will get rougher, more energetic, loud, and dangerous and my patience with him will increasingly get thinner. He will either pass out on the sofa with the lack of stimulation or he will run himself ragged until dinner time. Teagan will be playing with her toys, crying, nursing, or being worn by me.

Dinner will be eaten by my husband and myself usually without thought or enjoyment and then we will begin Nathan's nighttime routine which consists of the normal bottle drinking, tooth brushing, diaper and pajama changing. Then we add the prevacid, zyrtec, iron, vest, albuterol, hypertonic saline, and pulmozyme. Thank God he is currently off Tobi, I don't think I could sustain the additional half hour of treatments right now.

Jay carries Nathan and his 5 named microfleece blankets {Nathan named his blankets himself - his "circles", his "mario luigi", his "mickey house", his "blue one", and his "other blanky"} and panda bear pillow pet to bed.

I feed Teagan, she falls asleep, I bring her upstairs and put her into her cradle, she wakes right up, I bring her downstairs, she nurses again, I bring her upstairs after she falls asleep and usually the second time is usually successful.

Then I mindlessly lay on the sofa while Jay plays Wii and some hours later he wakes me up and I go to bed.

This is my day, EVERY day, very FEW things change in this daily routine.

So it is time to change.

First thing I changed was the morning coffee consumption. Neither Jay nor I have consumed a single cup of coffee since last Thursday. We are coffee aholics, truly addicted to the act of drinking our hot coffee our coffee mugs. Thanks to the Spark supplements our energy has never been more even throughout the entire day. No more energy level spiking up and down.

To be honest, we don't even miss the coffee itself. We do still miss the act of drinking it but that is part of my boring daily routine that had me sitting around doing nothing. Inactivity is b-o-r-i-n-g.

I also don't want Nathan sitting around all day being inactive. His lungs need exercise to be healthy and strong. His life depends on healthy lungs. I need to get him moving. At least the weather is getting nicer {or I thought it was...as soon as our deck was clear of snow and I was able to bring our Christmas inflatables inside, we woke up to over 6 inches of fresh snow} and we will be able to resume our daily walks to play at the park. Until then I will just have to put up with the headache of listening to the blower on the bounce house that takes up our entire living room. But you know what, we are very fortunate to have a bounce house. I am very grateful that Jay's brothers and sister and law gave them this gift for Christmas.

I still have to find ways to switch things up but as of now, I am feeling much better. I even jumped back into my old jogging routine. Hey, I only have about a month until the Out Run CF run. And side note it's the event organizer, Emily Schaller's birthday today.

Ok, enough rambling, time to get moving. I'll be drawing the winner for the $40 CSN gift card and will be announcing it this afternoon. Also don't forget to enter the giveaway for Advocare Spark (vitamin and amino acid energy supplement). I would love to help my lovely readers and friends reach some of their financial, energy, weight loss and fitness goals. My husband is only day 4 of the 24 day challenge and has already lost 6 pounds. He normally has an insatiable appetite and surprisingly doesn't even feel like he is starving. 

Friday, February 18, 2011

Light at the end of the tunnel and an Advocare Spark {giveaway!}

It has been really rough for me these past few days. I've had very little sleep because of Teagan and her cough/congestion. Yet at the same time I still have to keep up with Nathan and get stuff done around the house. I have been trying extremely hard to keep my cool and not overreact to the little things. Our water heater was broken but thanks to my husband and his father, it is now working again. Even if it was only a temporary fix, we have hot water! There was corrosion/build up on the plate that heats up near the sensor which I guess they just scraped off as much as possible.

And then I had a clinic appointment with Nathan. I really couldn't handle any more this week. But whenever I think I can't handle what's on my plate it seems like God sends me a life saver and this time it was in the form of an Advocare product.

I signed up to become an Advocare distributor last week and my kit just arrived in the nick of time. The one night I had only been able to sleep a very disrupted 5 hours because of Teagan's cough. I walked with her, bathed, and rocked her on and off all night long. I just wanted her to be comfortable. So when the sun came up, I was like "Oh great, now the day begins, I guess I'll be working a double". Nathan woke up and instead of making myself an entire pot of coffee I figured why not try some of my new Advocare product.

I have heard so many positive stories about many of the Advocare items so I wanted to find out for myself. So I mixed up a packed of Spark and gave it a try. Now I am not suggesting energy supplements as a replacement for sleep but I must say it is amazing! Instead of the quick pick me and crash of a cup of coffee, I felt focused for a good 3 hours.

I'm thinking one of the reasons I wasn't losing any weight was the amount of Hazelnut cream I was adding to each cup of coffee. If you figure 2 tablespoons per cup and 2-3 cups per day, all that sugar adds up.

And now that I've tried it for myself, I love it! And since it's Friday, I am happy and am feeling somewhat generous so why not kick off the weekend with a Spark giveaway! I want one of my readers to also have the chance of experiencing the mental clarity and energy that I experienced.


Advocare Spark Energy Drink

Would you like your very own box of Spark ($22.95 value) in your choice of flavor? Here's how:

Mandatory entry:
(1 entry) Visit my Advocare page and tell me what product you would be most interested in trying. You must complete the mandatory entry. A valid email address must be included so I have a way to contact you if you win.

For extra entries you can do any or all of the following. Leave a separate comment for each entry.

1 entry -Follow @CFMama on twitter and tweet this giveaway. Please tweet, “Win a box of Advocare Spark a #giveaway from @CFMama http://tinyurl.com/6j25cnl Ends Feb 24” Leave a comment with a link to your status.

You can tweet once a day for the duration of the contest. Leave a comment with link to your status for each tweet. 1 entry per day.

1 entry - Follow Nathan's Fight through Google Friend Connect. Leave a comment.

2 entries - Grab my button (to the left) and post it on your blog. Leave a comment with a link to your blog.

3 entries - Blog about this giveaway and link to it. Post a link in the comment.

2 entries - “Like” Nathan's Fight on Facebook. Leave a comment.

Open to US & Canada residents
This contest will end February 24st at midnight EST and a random winner will be chosen using random.org. You will have 24 hours to respond so be sure you leave a valid e-mail or a new winner will be chosen. I did not receive products or any form of compensation for this giveaway. I am a distributor of Advocare and purchased the product with my own money.
All opinions expressed are honest personal opinions.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Pretty things

Teagan has kept me up two days in a row with a nasty cough. I feel terrible that she sounds and feels miserable. I have an immense headache at the moment and can barely think so instead I am just going to be thankful for the help of family members and also for pretty things to look at.

valentines roses brookside florist vernon nj

These are my Valentine's Day roses from my sweet husband. He couldn't have gotten any closer to a floral arrangement that screamed my name and personality. Hot pink, black, polka dots - does he know me or what?

valentines roses brookside florist vernon nj

Also thanks to Pati, the creative genious over at Brookside Florist.

Pretty things

Teagan has kept me up two days in a row with a nasty cough. I feel terrible that she sounds and feels miserable. I have an immense headache at the moment and can barely think so instead I am just going to be thankful for the help of family members and also for pretty things to look at.

valentines roses brookside florist vernon nj

These are my Valentine's Day roses from my sweet husband. He couldn't have gotten any closer to a floral arrangement that screamed my name and personality. Hot pink, black, polka dots - does he know me or what?

valentines roses brookside florist vernon nj

Also thanks to Pati, the creative genius over at Brookside Florist.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Wordless Wednesday

teagan-4

Ok, can't resist, here come the words...

Yesterday was rough, last night was even rougher, this morning was the roughest BUT I refuse to let the pattern continue so I am going to try to turn our frowns upside down and have a great day at the CF clinic.

Teagan has clearly developed a juicy cough which I am only assuming is going to appear a few days from now but a hundred times worse for Nathan.

See the spot on Teagan's face? That is all thanks to her big brother who accidentally threw a piece of icy frozen snow directly at her face. I tried to do something to change the course of the day yesterday by putting my work away and taking Nathan and Teagan outside to play in the snow but that incident was the icing on my cake yesterday. I don't believe he had ill intentions but he had to be punished regardless. You just can't go around throwing ice at people. Both kids cried, mama felt like crying, but we are now all better.

today will be a good day, today WILL BE a GOOD DAY!!!!

Wordless Wednesday

teagan-4

Ok, can't resist, here come the words...

Yesterday was rough, last night was even rougher, this morning was the roughest BUT I refuse to let the pattern continue so I am going to try to turn our frowns upside down and have a great day at the CF clinic.

Teagan has clearly developed a juicy cough which I am only assuming is going to appear a few days from now but a hundred times worse for Nathan.

See the spot on Teagan's face? That is all thanks to her big brother who accidentally threw a piece of icy frozen snow directly at her face. I tried to do something to change the course of the day yesterday by putting my work away and taking Nathan and Teagan outside to play in the snow but that incident was the icing on my cake yesterday. I don't believe he had ill intentions but he had to be punished regardless. You just can't go around throwing ice at people. Both kids cried, mama felt like crying, but we are now all better.

today will be a good day, today WILL BE a GOOD DAY!!!!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Some days just never end

The days that seem to never end are usually the bad days. Why can't the good days drag on forever and the bad days fly by?

This morning we woke up to no hot water. That one gets a big fat sarcastic, Great! Not because it really matters in the now since I don't shower every day. But it definitely matters because one, my husband can't function without a shower in the morning and two, it would definitely matter tomorrow when I need to shower. And not to mention we would need to figure out the problem. A new hot water heater is definitely not in the budget of zero dollars.

Then add in a whining toddler who wants constant attention and a teething baby who wants to be in my arms all day long.

Forget about any work getting done, except for the fact that I have to get work done because we need money, bad. So that means more whining toddler, a cranky unshowered husband, and an upset baby that is just going to have to cry because I need my hands for other things.

So now I'm off to finish my participation in a research panel, something that both Nathan and Teagan are both clearly upset about.

Hoping for a better, less eventful tomorrow. Oh wait...forgot Nathan has a CF appointment at the hospital. Maybe Thursday will be my day. Praying for a good sputum culture.

Some days just never end

The days that seem to never end are usually the bad days. Why can't the good days drag on forever and the bad days fly by?

This morning we woke up to no hot water. That one gets a big fat sarcastic, Great! Not because it really matters in the now since I don't shower every day. But it definitely matters because one, my husband can't function without a shower in the morning and two, it would definitely matter tomorrow when I need to shower. And not to mention we would need to figure out the problem. A new hot water heater is definitely not in the budget of zero dollars.

Then add in a whining toddler who wants constant attention and a teething baby who wants to be in my arms all day long.

Forget about any work getting done, except for the fact that I have to get work done because we need money, bad. So that means more whining toddler, a cranky unshowered husband, and an upset baby that is just going to have to cry because I need my hands for other things.

So now I'm off to finish my participation in a research panel, something that both Nathan and Teagan are both clearly upset about.

Hoping for a better, less eventful tomorrow. Oh wait...forgot Nathan has a CF appointment at the hospital. Maybe Thursday will be my day. Praying for a good sputum culture.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine's Day | What it means to me

Personally, I've never been a huge fan of arbitrarily selected holidays. It's not that I don't agree with the meaning of the holidays I just don't like that we are told when to celebrate them. Valentine's Day for instance, is celebrated on February 14th every year. Why February 14th? February 14th is the feast day of Saint Valentine and is a day when we are supposed to express our love and affection for others. Really? We are only supposed to express love one day out of the entire year?

I am not a Valentine's Day grinch by any means. I love, and I love to love, but I prefer to love loving all year round.

I hate that this day is dreaded by many who feel that they should have only one person in their lives to purchase greeting cards and overpriced roses for. Call me fortunate but I have so many people in my life...friends, family, children, angels in Heaven...whom I absolutely love!

So, what will I be doing to celebrate love today. I plan go about business as usual then plan on picking up sushi take out, since an overcrowded restaurant on Valentine's Day will only bring out the grouch in me. We will bring the sushi back home and have a carpet picnic in front of the TV where we will watch our wedding DVD for the first time as a family of four. Other than that I just plan to enjoy my Monday, as much as Mondays can be enjoyed.

So that's that, I hope everyone has a fabulous Monday and that you all remember to love all year round.

Valentine's Day | What it means to me

Personally, I've never been a huge fan of arbitrarily selected holidays. It's not that I don't agree with the meaning of the holidays I just don't like that we are told when to celebrate them. Valentine's Day for instance, is celebrated on February 14th every year. Why February 14th? February 14th is the feast day of Saint Valentine and is a day when we are supposed to express our love and affection for others. Really? We are only supposed to express love one day out of the entire year?

I am not a Valentine's Day grinch by any means. I love, and I love to love, but I prefer to love loving all year round.

I hate that this day is dreaded by many who feel that they should have only one person in their lives to purchase greeting cards and overpriced roses for. Call me fortunate but I have so many people in my life...friends, family, children, angels in Heaven...whom I absolutely love!

So, what will I be doing to celebrate love today. I plan go about business as usual then plan on picking up sushi take out, since an overcrowded restaurant on Valentine's Day will only bring out the grouch in me. We will bring the sushi back home and have a carpet picnic in front of the TV where we will watch our wedding DVD for the first time as a family of four. Other than that I just plan to enjoy my Monday, as much as Mondays can be enjoyed.

So that's that, I hope everyone has a fabulous Monday and that you all remember to love all year round.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Nathan wears underpants

I haven't been able to post anything here in a few days. I have been pretty busy with mom dates, errands, website design, side business building, etc. But I wanted to share my excitement over something that clicked with Nathan last night. If you follow me on twitter you may already know that all of a sudden Nathan told me "I need underpants, mama".

So we stopped at Walmart and he picked out a 3 pack of Toy Story toddler briefs. When we returned home he wanted to wear the Rex pair and as soon as I pulled them up and told him not to pee in them, he did just that - soaked right through them.

So we went to the 2nd pair - Buzz and Woody. He successfully peed on the potty 6-7 times over the course of 5 hours. He had one accident on Grandma and Grandpa's carpet. He was so mad when I took his underwear off and put a pull up on him to drive home so I slipped the underwear on top.

I did put him to sleep in a diaper because he is a heavy wetter at night. This morning he is back in his underwear but I anticipate he is going to wet through them since every time I bring him to the potty he runs to his toys.

I am thinking this is the beginning of a long process of potty training and it seems like it is going to be more work for me (and Jay) than for Nathan.

Nathan wears underpants

I haven't been able to post anything here in a few days. I have been pretty busy with mom dates, errands, website design, side business building, etc. But I wanted to share my excitement over something that clicked with Nathan last night. If you follow me on twitter you may already know that all of a sudden Nathan told me "I need underpants, mama".

So we stopped at Walmart and he picked out a 3 pack of Toy Story toddler briefs. When we returned home he wanted to wear the Rex pair and as soon as I pulled them up and told him not to pee in them, he did just that - soaked right through them.

So we went to the 2nd pair - Buzz and Woody. He successfully peed on the potty 6-7 times over the course of 5 hours. He had one accident on Grandma and Grandpa's carpet. He was so mad when I took his underwear off and put a pull up on him to drive home so I slipped the underwear on top.

I did put him to sleep in a diaper because he is a heavy wetter at night. This morning he is back in his underwear but I anticipate he is going to wet through them since every time I bring him to the potty he runs to his toys.

I am thinking this is the beginning of a long process of potty training and it seems like it is going to be more work for me (and Jay) than for Nathan.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Of vaccinations, yeast, and coconut oil

It seems so much has been going on in my life lately and although I feel very busy I couldn't even begin to describe what I've been up to. What is occupying so much of my time? I can tell you what I have not been doing - our dishes. Our sink is once again overflowing with dishes and empty bottles of Pediasure. I also have not been folding and putting away the laundry. Sure, I've been washing and drying multiple loads of laundry and diapers every day, but once again I have an ever growing pile of clean laundry.

Teagan had a 5 month visit to the pediatrician today. She weighed 15 pounds, 9 ounces. The visit was only for a vaccine. I decided to follow an alternate vaccination schedule with her and although the pediatrician doesn't have a problem with it per se, he doesn't exactly agree with the slightly delayed alternate vaccination schedule. Every single visit one of the pediatricians tries to intimidate me into signing off on a whole slew of injections saying she is already so far behind. But ultimately I call the shots.

She is not behind on anything. She is 5 months old, has 2 teeth, is up on her hands and knees, and is days away from crawling. She is not enrolled in day care and will have all her required immunizations by the time she really needs them - school. I know children who started their immunizations much later than Teagan and are basically up to date at 2 years old. I am not anti (most) immunizations, I just don't see the need to inject so many all in one visit. Vaccine chemical overload for sure. Basically I am giving her one to two vaccines per visit* (instead of 6) because I want to give her tiny little body a chance to detoxify the chemicals in the vaccines.

*We have recently chosen to follow the Dr. Sears Alternate Vaccine Schedule Although she didn't begin receiving her vaccinations until a short time ago, we aren't going to be playing "catch up", we will just be picking up where she falls into the schedule. So even though she didn't receive the 4 month recommended vaccines on the alternate schedule she is still starting with the 5 month vaccines.

Teagan has also developed a yeast diaper rash. I've been letting her play without a diaper on so that her bottom can air out but the rash has not gotten any better. I only use a phosphate, dye, and fragrance free detergent to wash the cloth diapers so I didn't believe that to be the cause of the rash. The pediatrician today confirmed that it did appear to be a yeast rash. Poor little girl, yeast infections are one of my two least favorite things, urinary tract infections are pretty rotten as well. So I've been applying coconut oil, one of my two favorite home remedies for almost everything, to the affected areas. I have come to the conclusion that breast milk* and coconut oil can cure most ailments. Applied topically in the case of a yeast infection, the medium chain fatty acids in coconut oil (which are also good for those with malabsorption, ie. Cystic Fibrosis, pancreatic insufficiency, Nathan) are effective in killing off yeast. Her rash is already beginning to look much better.

*breast milk is not a good remedy for a yeast infection since yeast thrives in the presence of the sugars found in human milk.

Of vaccinations, yeast, and coconut oil

It seems so much has been going on in my life lately and although I feel very busy I couldn't even begin to describe what I've been up to. What is occupying so much of my time? I can tell you what I have not been doing - our dishes. Our sink is once again overflowing with dishes and empty bottles of Pediasure. I also have not been folding and putting away the laundry. Sure, I've been washing and drying multiple loads of laundry and diapers every day, but once again I have an ever growing pile of clean laundry.

Teagan had a 5 month visit to the pediatrician today. She weighed 15 pounds, 9 ounces. The visit was only for a vaccine. I decided to follow an alternate vaccination schedule with her and although the pediatrician doesn't have a problem with it per se, he doesn't exactly agree with the slightly delayed alternate vaccination schedule. Every single visit one of the pediatricians tries to intimidate me into signing off on a whole slew of injections saying she is already so far behind. But ultimately I call the shots.

She is not behind on anything. She is 5 months old, has 2 teeth, is up on her hands and knees, and is days away from crawling. She is not enrolled in day care and will have all her required immunizations by the time she really needs them - school. I know children who started their immunizations much later than Teagan and are basically up to date at 2 years old. I am not anti (most) immunizations, I just don't see the need to inject so many all in one visit. Vaccine chemical overload for sure. Basically I am giving her one to two vaccines per visit* (instead of 6) because I want to give her tiny little body a chance to detoxify the chemicals in the vaccines.

*We have recently chosen to follow the Dr. Sears Alternate Vaccine Schedule Although she didn't begin receiving her vaccinations until a short time ago, we aren't going to be playing "catch up", we will just be picking up where she falls into the schedule. So even though she didn't receive the 4 month recommended vaccines on the alternate schedule she is still starting with the 5 month vaccines.

Teagan has also developed a yeast diaper rash. I've been letting her play without a diaper on so that her bottom can air out but the rash has not gotten any better. I only use a phosphate, dye, and fragrance free detergent to wash the cloth diapers so I didn't believe that to be the cause of the rash. The pediatrician today confirmed that it did appear to be a yeast rash. Poor little girl, yeast infections are one of my two least favorite things, urinary tract infections are pretty rotten as well. So I've been applying coconut oil, one of my two favorite home remedies for almost everything, to the affected areas. I have come to the conclusion that breast milk* and coconut oil can cure most ailments. Applied topically in the case of a yeast infection, the medium chain fatty acids in coconut oil (which are also good for those with malabsorption, ie. Cystic Fibrosis, pancreatic insufficiency, Nathan) are effective in killing off yeast. Her rash is already beginning to look much better.

*breast milk is not a good remedy for a yeast infection since yeast thrives in the presence of the sugars found in human milk.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Crawling | So Close She Can Almost Taste It

I know, two video posts in two days but I can't help myself. Teagan is really SO CLOSE to crawling and as you can tell in the video one little boy is not so sure he wants that to happen. At first Nathan yells "No, Teagan, NO!!!" then he says "walk, Teagan".

Crawling | So Close She Can Almost Taste It

I know, two video posts in two days but I can't help myself. Teagan is really SO CLOSE to crawling and as you can tell in the video one little boy is not so sure he wants that to happen. At first Nathan yells "No, Teagan, NO!!!" then he says "walk, Teagan".

Monday, February 7, 2011

baby push ups

Nathan has been sleeping for 3 hours, and counting, praise God! Really, he needed the sleep.

Now, what I am about to say is really quite embarrassing but here it goes...My 5 month old daughter does better push ups than I do. Her form is near perfect.

baby push ups

Nathan has been sleeping for 3 hours, and counting, praise God! Really, he needed the sleep.

Now, what I am about to say is really quite embarrassing but here it goes...My 5 month old daughter does better push ups than I do. Her form is near perfect.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

What can I say?

I am not watching the Super Bowl. I was going to but Nathan has had a horrible day.

This morning was the last dose of a 56 day cycle of (twice a day) inhaled antibiotics and unfortunately he sounds horrible, again. I'm not really sure how many days he has been well since the end of September. It breaks my heart. He has a few good days and then he has a couple of horrible weeks. Going back to the clinic in about a week, if not sooner, to get down to the bottom of this.

But the reason why we didn't watch the football game, and commercials, is that he was screaming for the duration of his vest and nebs. So we tried to entertain him in whatever ways that would keep him happy. It is a bit difficult to figure out exactly what he wants because his wants are very specific. Jay had to play Mario Kart, but could only race with Princess, and had to pick a certain vehicle, and a certain course, and would scream and carry on if we couldn't figure out which one. My head aches just thinking about it.

So now Nathan and Teagan are in bed and Jay and I are, well just plain exhausted and no longer have any interest in watching the Super Bowl. So that's that. On a nicer note, I did enjoy the most terrific sunshine today. I was so happy, I felt my skin producing vitamin D. And I also enjoyed a photo session with a one year old little girl. I posted two photos on my facebook page and will post more soon.

What can I say?

I am not watching the Super Bowl. I was going to but Nathan has had a horrible day.

This morning was the last dose of a 56 day cycle of (twice a day) inhaled antibiotics and unfortunately he sounds horrible, again. I'm not really sure how many days he has been well since the end of September. It breaks my heart. He has a few good days and then he has a couple of horrible weeks. Going back to the clinic in about a week, if not sooner, to get down to the bottom of this.

But the reason why we didn't watch the football game, and commercials, is that he was screaming for the duration of his vest and nebs. So we tried to entertain him in whatever ways that would keep him happy. It is a bit difficult to figure out exactly what he wants because his wants are very specific. Jay had to play Mario Kart, but could only race with Princess, and had to pick a certain vehicle, and a certain course, and would scream and carry on if we couldn't figure out which one. My head aches just thinking about it.

So now Nathan and Teagan are in bed and Jay and I are, well just plain exhausted and no longer have any interest in watching the Super Bowl. So that's that. On a nicer note, I did enjoy the most terrific sunshine today. I was so happy, I felt my skin producing vitamin D. And I also enjoyed a photo session with a one year old little girl. I posted two photos on my facebook page and will post more soon.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Tomorrow (updated)

Update: It's 8 am "Tomorrow" morning and we are downstairs playing Donkey Kong Returns on the Wii. We meaning Jay, Nathan, and me. Teagan is still upstairs in her cradle and has been since 9 pm last night. Of course she would make a liar out of me. In the meantime I could probably put out a fire with my boobs 2o feet away from me.

I will be waking up before the crack of dawn on purpose. Nathan has not napped during the day in well over two weeks and a certain little screeching pterodactyl (Teagan) has been waking him up at 7 am on the dot every single day. She is not crying or upset, she is just awake and exercising her vocal cords, talking to herself or perhaps to the recessed lights or the white ceiling. It is actually really cute. Cute in every aspect, except for the fact that she is waking up an extremely over tired and constantly sick big brother, Nathan. So tomorrow I will be waking up before the screeching begins to take her downstairs, on the other side of the house, possibly even to the basement just to let Nathan catch up on sleep. Next step, Teagan and I will have to schedule sleepovers at the grandparents houses.

Tomorrow (updated)

Update: It's 8 am "Tomorrow" morning and we are downstairs playing Donkey Kong Returns on the Wii. We meaning Jay, Nathan, and me. Teagan is still upstairs in her cradle and has been since 9 pm last night. Of course she would make a liar out of me. In the meantime I could probably put out a fire with my boobs 2o feet away from me.

I will be waking up before the crack of dawn on purpose. Nathan has not napped during the day in well over two weeks and a certain little screeching pterodactyl (Teagan) has been waking him up at 7 am on the dot every single day. She is not crying or upset, she is just awake and exercising her vocal cords, talking to herself or perhaps to the recessed lights or the white ceiling. It is actually really cute. Cute in every aspect, except for the fact that she is waking up an extremely over tired and constantly sick big brother, Nathan. So tomorrow I will be waking up before the screeching begins to take her downstairs, on the other side of the house, possibly even to the basement just to let Nathan catch up on sleep. Next step, Teagan and I will have to schedule sleepovers at the grandparents houses.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

CF Awareness Around the Globe {Panama}

nathan panama4

Isn't this photograph amazing? Looking at it makes me want to pull up a hammock, take a deep breath, and relax. And there is something about a little kid in an over sized t-shirt that makes me want to go, "Awwwww". But wait, what's that on the back of the shirt? Let's take a closer look.

nathan panama2

It's Nathan's 2010 CF fundraising t-shirt on a little girl in Panama. So you may be wondering how Nathan reached people around the globe. A few of my friends moved down to Panama and actually started a really cool business called Bocas Blended, it's a smoothie business operated on only the coolest bus ever. Click on that link above and you can see pictures of the bus, complete with a lounge on the roof.

Anyway, this little girl and her family lived next door to my friends and after hearing about Nathan, the little girl wanted to help show how Nathan's cause has reached people all over the globe. So my high school friend, Courtney, took these photos and emailed them to me.

nathan panama5

I can't even begin to describe how much this means to me.

nathan panama9

A breath of life for Nathan in the trees of Panama.

nathan panama1

nathan panama3

CF Awareness Around the Globe {Panama}

nathan panama4

Isn't this photograph amazing? Looking at it makes me want to pull up a hammock, take a deep breath, and relax. And there is something about a little kid in an over sized t-shirt that makes me want to go, "Awwwww". But wait, what's that on the back of the shirt? Let's take a closer look.

nathan panama2

It's Nathan's 2010 CF fundraising t-shirt on a little girl in Panama. So you may be wondering how Nathan reached people around the globe. A few of my friends moved down to Panama and actually started a really cool business called Bocas Blended, it's a smoothie business operated on only the coolest bus ever. Click on that link above and you can see pictures of the bus, complete with a lounge on the roof.

Anyway, this little girl and her family lived next door to my friends and after hearing about Nathan, the little girl wanted to help show how Nathan's cause has reached people all over the globe. So my high school friend, Courtney, took these photos and emailed them to me.

nathan panama5

I can't even begin to describe how much this means to me.

nathan panama9

A breath of life for Nathan in the trees of Panama.

nathan panama1

nathan panama3

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

He's {coming} back

These are the things that I look forward to. Food covering my son's face, and not because I forced him to try something. For the record, I refuse to force him to try anything anymore. I've done this a few times in the past and I now believe this is the worst thing I could do to get him to become accepting of food and eating.

Nathan eat Jan 2011 edit

Not even a month into his Prevacid regime, he has begun to eat the foods he used to love and taste new foods. I have gotten into the habit of not even torturing him at the table. Sometimes I would just request he sit with us. Other times I would just let him continue to play or do his own thing. But rarely ever would I torture him with a plate of food that I knew he would adamently refuse. My husband and I would just continue preparing one bottle of pediasure after the other. We would go through the motions of ordering McDonald's Happy Meals and just be happy that he would drink all of his "creams".

But now he is beginning to ask for food and sit down at the table when he wants something. I have to begin paying extra attention to these moments since it is unfamiliar territory. Last night he sat down at the table and asked for a grilled cheese, helped me melt the butter in the pan (watched, no touching near the stove), and then proceeded to eat almost 3/4 of the sandwich.

Today I told him I was going to make eggs for my own breakfast and he pushed a chair over to the stove and wanted to help crack it. Then I got the idea that he was somewhat interested in eating the egg after asking him if he wanted a piece of toast with butter. So I put it on his plate assuming it was progress just to have him accept seeing the egg on his own plate but then he went ahead and shocked me by taking a bite.

I felt like jumping up and down with excitement but I didn't want to draw any attention to the out of the ordinary behavior so I just sat there eating my own breakfast. I must admit that I did begin singing Brobee's There's a Party in [Nathan's] Tummy. And apparently this sparked the idea that Nathan wanted yogurt, or Yoba Gabba yogurt as Nathan called it. I didn't find the connection to Yo Gabba Gabba until I remembered the episode when Toodee tried yogurt and liked it.

Photo credit: NickJr.com

I'm so happy!!

He's {coming} back

These are the things that I look forward to. Food covering my son's face, and not because I forced him to try something. For the record, I refuse to force him to try anything anymore. I've done this a few times in the past and I now believe this is the worst thing I could do to get him to become accepting of food and eating.

Nathan eat Jan 2011 edit

Not even a month into his Prevacid regime, he has begun to eat the foods he used to love and taste new foods. I have gotten into the habit of not even torturing him at the table. Sometimes I would just request he sit with us. Other times I would just let him continue to play or do his own thing. But rarely ever would I torture him with a plate of food that I knew he would adamently refuse. My husband and I would just continue preparing one bottle of pediasure after the other. We would go through the motions of ordering McDonald's Happy Meals and just be happy that he would drink all of his "creams".

But now he is beginning to ask for food and sit down at the table when he wants something. I have to begin paying extra attention to these moments since it is unfamiliar territory. Last night he sat down at the table and asked for a grilled cheese, helped me melt the butter in the pan (watched, no touching near the stove), and then proceeded to eat almost 3/4 of the sandwich.

Today I told him I was going to make eggs for my own breakfast and he pushed a chair over to the stove and wanted to help crack it. Then I got the idea that he was somewhat interested in eating the egg after asking him if he wanted a piece of toast with butter. So I put it on his plate assuming it was progress just to have him accept seeing the egg on his own plate but then he went ahead and shocked me by taking a bite.

I felt like jumping up and down with excitement but I didn't want to draw any attention to the out of the ordinary behavior so I just sat there eating my own breakfast. I must admit that I did begin singing Brobee's There's a Party in [Nathan's] Tummy. And apparently this sparked the idea that Nathan wanted yogurt, or Yoba Gabba yogurt as Nathan called it. I didn't find the connection to Yo Gabba Gabba until I remembered the episode when Toodee tried yogurt and liked it.

Photo credit: NickJr.com

I'm so happy!!